Moments Before the Wind

animalstalkinginallcaps:

OKAY, LOOK. HERE’S THE BREAKDOWN. LUKE, CHRISSY AND SPECKLES ARE ALL VEGAN, SO NO DAIRY, NO FISH, NO NOTHING. I SOAKED A DISH SCRUBBIE IN SOY SAUCE ONCE AND THEY WENT ON AND ON ABOUT HOW AMAZING IT TASTED, SO DON’T BREAK YOUR BACK WORRYING ABOUT TRYING TO FIND GOURMET STUFF FOR THEM. JUST MAKE SURE THERE’S NO MEAT.

DAN, BEAK-BEAK AND FLOPPERS ARE PESCATARIAN, SO NO BURGERS OR SECOND COUSINS OR ANYTHING, BUT ANY KIND OF SALMON OR SHRIMP DISH WOULD GO OVER GREAT. MAKE SURE YOU MARK THEM, THOUGH. I MEAN IT. SPECKLES HAS A SHELLFISH ALLERGY ON TOP OF BEING A HUGE WHINER, SO IF HE DIES THEY’RE PULLING YOUR UNION CARD. MARK MY WORDS.

AS FOR THE REST OF US, JUST GET WHATEVER’S WITHIN BUDGET AND NOT TOTAL GARBAGE. SORRY TO BE SUCH A PAIN IN THE ASS. IF IT WERE UP TO ME YOU’D JUST BE GRABBING 13 SURF AND TURF SPECIALS, BUT THE PRIMADONNAS WOULD THROW A FIT.

AND THANK YOU, ROB. I KNOW THE CATERING CREW CATCHES HELL FROM THE TALENT SOMETIMES, BUT WE APPRECIATE ALL YOUR HARD WORK. HONEST.